DAY 2

This exercise business is going to require more thought.

Yesterday evening I trotted-slash-walked along behind the kids to the park. Couple Ks. Excellent start. I could feel my backside shrinking as the fresh air infused my lungs and the ground rose to meet my 5 year old sneakers with the air holes in the big toe.

Fired up the barbeque and cooked chicken sausages, onions and sliced potato. Placed on sesame bun with cheese and salad. Felt backside expand.

Walked briskly home. Felt backside contract.

Had beer. Felt backside expand.

Skipped dinner. Felt virtuous.

Became ravenously hungry at 10.30pm and had strawberry tart.

I now see that my theory is flawed. One cannot achieve weight loss when one is running toward a barbeque. If I continue in this vein my lifestyle will achieve perfect balance which means that my backside will retain its current shape and keep hanging out with riffraff like Gravity.

But this is okay. Every plan needs to be refined.

I happen to know that there are a set of steps at a railway overpass near my home. I also know that this overpass is directly opposite Crazy Cat Lady's house. I don't know if she's really crazy but anyone with that many cats has a prima facie case against them.

***

Kids decided to follow me to overpass. Minutes tock by as we search for hats, sunscreen, shoes, extra water, tissues etc and finally we're off. By now it's uncharacteristically hot. Halfway there Master Three reneges. Walk home again. Walk back to railway. Bloody cats everywhere.

23 steps. I go up and down 15 times. That's 345 steps. By now I have chest pains and my head feels like it's going to pop. When we get home the radio announces we are having a mini heatwave. Resist urge to claim it's a sign from God and renounce all exercise from here-on-after as a sign of piety.

After a gallon of Gatorade and a quick lie down it's time to choose my new challenge for the day. I've done the physical. What about the mental?

I wrote 2 books several years ago. One was a cook book with a funky twist. I was told by agents that it was a great idea but unless I was a celebrity nobody would publish it. That was before 4 Ingredients went gangbusters. Go girls!

Challenge Number 2: Resurrect cook book and do a little work on it every day.

Oh yeah.